DOMINUS PARS HÆREDITATIS MEÆ

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May 4

Hi Father, I know that the church is against homosexual persons being priests but what about religious life like a hermit?

Anonymous

Hello anon:

I addressed this question a while back on my blog. Here is a link to that post from July 29, 2012:

http://fatherangel.tumblr.com/post/28231673136/i-am-a-freshman-college-student-who-has-same-sex

Here is a link to the Vatican document which speaks of the admission of homosexual men as candidates for the priesthood:

http://www.vatican.va/roman_curia/congregations/ccatheduc/documents/rc_con_ccatheduc_doc_20051104_istruzione_en.html

I make a distinction which I believe that George Weigel also made in this Instruction. 

Namely, I do not believe that the Church is against homosexual men being priests. I believe those who cannot be admitted are those who have “deep seated tendencies.” That means, in my personal opinion, that the Church does not turn away a man for having same sex attraction.

Rather, if the same sex attraction causes other emotion, psychological, and spiritual problems, the man cannot be an effective priest. If a man has SSA, but is grounded in his Catholic Faith and prepared to obey and collaborate with his bishop and others in ministry, there is no reason he could not be a good priest.

And let me add here that even “straight” guys who have deep seated tendencies which are unhealthy are also turned away or asked to leave the priestly formation. Some of the deep seated tendencies are having to trumpet your sexuality and show you are overly sexualized in your thinking. Does a guy have to advertise “I’m gay” instead of just identifying as a son of God and a son of the Church?

Does a guy see other guys in a sexualized way? Can he minister to parishioners without commenting and noticing their physical appearance or how “sexy” they are? Again, a heterosexual candidate could also be dismissed if he is overly sexualized. An example of being sexualized in an unhealthy way would be joking with a woman in the parish, “we’d make nice babies together.”

Does a guy need to push the agenda of certain members of the LGBT community. Does he refer to them as “my people” or “my family?” Does a guy with SSA see the Church as “persecuting” and “martyring” the LGBT community merely because it stands by the moral beliefs of 2000 years?

Is the guy very narcissistic in regards to his psycho-sexual maturity? Does he show himself to be an “attention w*ore?” The priest is Brazil who was recently excommunicated is a sad and cliché example of neediness which was very unhealthy. He posed in front of photographers in his jeans, loafers, earring, at his private bar where he was holding a beer in his hand. 

The photo screamed “LOOK AT ME. I’M CUTE AND THE CHURCH IS FREAKING JEALOUS AT MY EPICOSITY.” That is a symptom of a man with a very unhealthy and frozen maturity. We are talking about a 14 year old kid in a 47 year old man’s body. Some of these problems are very pronounced in some of the homosexual candidates who have presented themselves for priestly formation.

When some of these tendencies are deep seated, the Church is saying that the guy will be a very unhappy priest—but not because of being homosexual, but because of deep seated tendencies which are unhealthy in some members of the homosexual community. 

As I have said though, the heterosexual with similar issues would also be turned away and at the same time, the guy who is homosexual but has a well grounded faith and a mature character should be able to enter the priesthood and be very happy and effective in the sacred ministry. God bless and take care! Fr. Angel

Apr 4

Father is there any advice you can give for a young person discerning religious life and is unsure if it's the right path? Thank you for your enlightening posts.

Anonymous

Hello anon:

I’m not sure how enlightening my posts are, but I just hope they dispel a few questions about the Catholic Faith. Thanks for the nice compliment.

Just a few thoughts here, although Father Shane has a great vocations blog with lots of wonderful advice and I highly recommend it:

http://vocationquestions.com/

Do you love God? His Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ? Do you wish to have the gifts and holiness of their Holy Spirit? Seek you first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things will be given unto you as well (Matthew 6:33).

A person who discerns a religious vocation first of all falls in love with the Lord, with the blessed Virgin Mary, with the Communion of Saints, with the holy angels, and with the great teachers and leaders of our Catholic Tradition. It is in this love, with this love, and from this love, that you wish to serve the Church.

If you are not really jazzed about your relationship with the Lord, and the desire to spread His Kingdom on earth, the religious vocation is not the right path.

The other thought that comes to mind is love for people. You have to not just be curious about “people.” As you are sitting at Mass, and looking out over the congregation, and you see black and white, rich and poor, beautiful people and not so beautiful, old and young, educated and school dropout, what do you feel, what are your “vibes?” Jesus saw the multitude, and His heart was touched, He was emotional, because there were so many, they were so hungry, and they were like sheep without a shepherd (Mark 6:4).

You have to love people and want to serve them. You have to be really, really, really concerned about getting their souls to heaven. You have to totally want them to have the relationship with Jesus Christ that has brought peace to your heart. Do you want this for all those people out there, of all walks of life? What are you willing to do to be there servant? What will you sacrifice?

Priests who work in parishes need to love people, but especially those who are called to a religious order, because the religious orders in the Catholic Church have been known for serving the most lowly, and having great concern for those who are needy.

The other thing is to deal with your romantic ideas and love life and get your house in order. On Tumblr we see guys and girls do this:

1) Yeah!!! I’m going to the convent or the seminary!! 2) No, second thought I can’t go because I need to be holier and go on a retreat. 3) Yeah!!! I just got back from a retreat. OMG, I can’t wait to apply for the seminary or the convent!! 4) Wait, I just met somebody and I think we have a thing for each other. Wait, no I’m not going after all, because I am totally IN LUV, in luv, in luv! 5) Oh no, my heart is broken. STOP, my beating heart, I just got dumped by the love of my life. Come back! come back (like Rose from the Titanic).

6) Ok, so I guess I’m discerning again for the seminary or convent. LOLOLOLOLOL. 

So, if you are not sure how you will handle when you are dating, or what life will be like when you start to date, or if you have dated and aren’t dating but may want to start dating again, just hold off on “discernment” and straighten that out first. After all, for most people, the first “call of nature” is….ahem….you know—marriage and kids.

It takes great balance and a steady and firm sense of wanting to give your life to the Church before you can actually do that in a stable and long-term way. Because even though the first year is just novitiate or being tested, you need to go to the seminary or convent really prepared to give yourself over to that formation program. God bless and take care! Fr. Angel

Should priests study only pre-Vatican II books?

adaltaredei said: I have to disagree with the training doctors with books from the 40s. There is nothing wrong with the way they are trained; there’s a difference between progress in the medical field and theology…

fatherangel responds: Andrew, although there is a difference between the progress which is made in medicine, a science whose foundation is in the observation of physical realities, and theology, whose foundation is Divine Revelation, there is nonetheless a true progress made in both. This is my point. 

A priest, first of all, should be trained in a seminary erected canonically and legitimately by the local bishop or the governing board of a religious order. The SSPX, according to the Pope, exercise “no legitimate ministry” in the Church, and so have no permission, no authorization, and therefore no legitimacy with which to train Catholic priests. I would call that “something wrong with the way they are trained.”

Secondly, a Catholic priest must be learned in what concerns the life of the Church yesterday, today, and for the foreseeable future. It is unacceptable, and unsatisfactory in the mind of the Church, for the priest to merely study the books of past theologians and repeat formulas of the past, as if intelligent Catholic scholars have not been researching and presenting new information not possessed by past authors. And I do not understand how you can think “there is nothing wrong” with the way the SSPX priests are trained when they possess no in-depth study of the last Ecumenical Council of the Church.

As Pope Pius XI states, the clergy must minister to the “learned and the unlearned” and for the former, the must be learned also, and you cannot be learned in theology if the texts you read were all written before 1962.

I commend as a spiritual bouquet to you the following words of Pope Pius XI. It is a long quote, but it is worth reading carefully:

“57. But the portrait of the Catholic priest which we intend to exhibit to the world would be unfinished were We to omit another most important feature,—learning. This the Church requires of him; for the Catholic priest is set up as a “Master in Israel”; he has received from Jesus Christ the office and commission of teaching truth: “Teach … all nations.” He must teach the truth that heals and saves; and because of this teaching, like the Apostle of the Gentiles, he has a duty towards “the learned and the unlearned.” But how can he teach unless he himself possess knowledge? “The lips of the priest shall keep knowledge, and they shall seek the law at his mouth,” said the Holy Spirit in the Prophecy of Malachy. Who could ever utter a word in praise of sacerdotal learning more weighty than that which divine Wisdom itself once spoke by the mouth of Osee: “Because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will reject thee that thou shalt not do the office of priesthood to Me.” The priest should have full grasp of the Catholic teaching on faith and morals; he should know how to present it to others; and he should be able to give the reasons for the dogmas, laws and observances of the Church of which he is minister. Profane sciences have indeed made much progress; but in religious questions there is much ignorance still darkening the mind of our contemporaries. This ignorance the priest must dispel. Never was more pointed than today the warning of Tertullian, “Hoc unum gestit interdum (veritas), ne ignorata damnetur,” “This alone truth sometime craves, that it be not condemned unheard.” It is the priest’s task to clear away from men’s minds the mass of prejudices and misunderstandings which hostile adversaries have piled up; the modern mind is eager for the truth, and the priest should be able to point it out with serene frankness; there are souls still hesitating, distressed by doubts, and the priest should inspire courage and trust, and guide them with calm security to the safe port of faith, faith accepted by both head and heart; error makes its onslaughts, arrogant and persistent, and the priest should know how to meet them with a defense vigorous and active, yet solid and unruffled.

58. Therefore, Venerable Brethren, it is necessary that the priest, even among the absorbing tasks of his charge, and ever with a view to it, should continue his theological studies with unremitting zeal. The knowledge acquired at the seminary is indeed a sufficient foundation with which to begin; but it must be grasped more thoroughly, and perfected by an ever-increasing knowledge and understanding of the sacred sciences. Herein is the source of effective preaching and of influence over the souls of others. Yet even more is required. The dignity of the office he holds and the maintenance of a becoming respect and esteem among the people, which helps so much in his pastoral work, demand more than purely ecclesiastical learning. The priest must be graced by no less knowledge and culture than is usual among well-bred and well-educated people of his day. This is to say that he must be healthily modern, as is the Church, which is at home in all times and all places, and adapts itself to all; which blesses and furthers all healthy initiative and has no fear of the progress, even the most daring progress, of science; if only it be true science.

59. Indeed, in all ages the Catholic clergy has distinguished itself in every field of human knowledge; in fact, in certain centuries it so took the lead in the field of learning that the word “cleric” became synonymous with “learned.” The Church preserved and saved the treasures of ancient culture, which without her and her monasteries would have been almost entirely lost; and her most illustrious Doctors show that all human knowledge can help to throw light upon and to defend the Catholic faith. An illustrious example of this We Ourselves have recently called to the world’s attention. For We crowned with the halo of sanctity and the glorious title of Doctor of the Church that great teacher of the incomparable Aquinas: Albert of Cologne, whom his contemporaries had already honored with the titles of Great and of Universal Doctor.

60. Today it could hardly be hoped that the clergy could hold a similar primacy in every branch of knowledge; the range of human science has become so vast that no man can comprehend it all, much less become distinguished in each of its numberless branches. Nevertheless wise encouragement and help should be given to those members of the clergy, who, by taste and special gifts, feel a call to devote themselves to study and research, in this or that branch of science, in this or that art; they do not thereby deny their clerical profession; for all this, undertaken within just limits and under the guidance of the Church, redounds to the good estate of the Church and to the glory of her divine Head, Jesus Christ. And among the rest of the clergy, none should remain content with a standard of learning and culture which sufficed, perhaps, in other times; they must try to attain—or, rather, they must actually attain—a higher standard of general education and of learning. It must be broader and more complete; and it must correspond to the generally higher level and wider scope of modern education as compared with the past.”

God bless and take care! Fr. Angel

Hello Father! Guy discerning a diocesan priesthood over here, if God wants i´ll postulate in 2013. Great blog! It´s good to find priests over here. AMDG

Hola José María:

Que gran gusto para mí conocerte, Chema, a través de Tumblr. Gracias por presentarse conmigo y por el haberme informado de tu inquietud vocacional. Cuenta, hermano, con mi recordatorio en el altar para que la voluntad de Dios sea cumplido en tu vida.  

Dear Jose Maria: What a pleasure to make your acquaintance through Tumblr. Thanks for introducing yourself to me. I’ve seen your blog before, I think, but now it’s great to meet you and hear about your vocational stirrings. Please count on my remembrance of you at the altar, so that God’s holy will is fulfilled in your life. God bless and take care! Fr. Angel

Hi Father! I'm moving in to the Juan Diego House this Wednesday and is there any advice you can give me? Thanks & God bless! :)

Hello Louie!!

Has the day already arrived? You are so blessed, to be studying in a great Archdiocese, and under a fantastic Archbishop. You are also blessed to have some very good people in charge of formation at Juan Diego House. Be thankful to God for the gift of a call to the priesthood and being able to answer this call in Los Angeles. That archdiocese is special to Our Blessed Mother, and “The Angels” is the city of my patrons the holy angels.

Seminary community is too good to be true. In no time at all, you will feel like brothers and family. But families also get in fights, have jealousies, and hold grudges at times. Be accepting and open to your brothers, whatever their level of knowledge of our faith, or whether they’re liberal or conservative, or very serious about priesthood or kind of goofing off. Help them smooth out their rough edges, and they will be patient with you and help you out also.

Make time for brothers in the community, but set limits. Give them fraternal correction, but carefully and at the right time when they’re more open to it. Avoid arguing about petty things but give testimony to what has helped your Catholic Faith. Learn to laugh at jokes, don’t take yourself too seriously, and never lose the mischievous spirit for fun and craziness. That means also chuckling at the humanity of the Church—so many people with so many faults. Don’t worry about gossip about the local church—the Archdiocese is no worse than any other organization with human beings who are trying to do right by their Faith.

Ask God to make you more joyful than serious: we have the greatest vocation on earth because we get to take care of the Catholic faithful. Yes, do your chores, take your responsibilities seriously, especially the responsibility to study and learn with a well-rounded program of academics. But don’t take yourself too seriously. In fact, the formation leaders will be pointing out your faults along the way and if you are chill about it, you will take it in stride and not take everything so personally.

The essence of the priestly calling is intimate, loyal, and devoted love for Jesus in the Mass, filial veneration of His holy Mother, and obedience to the rightful authority of the Holy Father and of the Church. Keep up your spiritual reading and private prayer so that you cultivate more and more tender love for Our Lord. In turn, some day, He will make you a joyful priest and fervent as you give the sacraments to His flock. Whatever you give to Jesus, in time and energy and generous heart, He will give back to you tenfold. 

In the diocesan or parish priesthood, we have to read the lives of the saints but we are not “Franciscan” or “Dominican” or “Jesuit.” That is because our spirituality borrows from all the great saints without being too focused on just one school of spirituality. We do not have the call of teaching alone, or service to the poor alone, or administration only, because our labor borrows from all the different ministries and so we train to be a “jack of all trades.”

Our special charism in parish priesthood is to take charge and to lead parishes with a practical mind for making them run with peace and unity, even though people are so diverse. We are constantly in the world, and dealing with worldly challenges while trying to form worldly people into parishes with a communal spirit.

In one hand, we are armed with the word of God and Catholic Tradition, in the other hand we are holding the newspaper and keeping our eyes and ears open to the culture and activities of our cities and neighborhoods. We have to deal with the public square, the marketplace, and very practical issues. So learn your Thomas Aquinas, but don’t forget you’ll be dealing often with locks, lighting, the loot, the litter and cleanup, and parish liturgy which reaches the people.

Some might look up to priests who have fancy degrees and preach eloquent homilies. They may call us diocesan priests “worldly” men but really we are the priests of the trenches. So always keep your heart in the trenches, keep it real and have lots of sympathy for real people and their real problems. Sometimes you might be sweet and loving. At other times, like a drill sergeant taking charge, you have to be a bastard because you’re looking out for your parishioners and being protective like a shepherd (By bastard, I mean lay down the law and tell people bluntly what you think of them, even if you tick them off).

The diocesan priest is fiercely independent. While working with our bishop and brother priests as a “prebyterate” or team of clergy, we constantly have to go back to the drawing board and figure out new ways to keep God in the streets. So in formation, obedience does not mean bowing and scraping and kissing anyone’s butt. Don’t challenge and be rude to the formation leaders, but don’t fear them either. 

And by the way, in the seminary, they don’t like to see you act like a wuss. They don’t mind if you get testy once in a while or challenge them with a question or two, because that is part of the personality of a leader. I don’t mean get whiny. They can’t stand that either, because it doesn’t show toughness, just a guy who can act like a princess. 

To sum up, enjoy the communal life, but learn to blaze your own trail also and be your own person. Be nice and apologize when you’re wrong, but don’t be anybody’s patsy—stand up for yourself. Pray, confess, go to Mass, and do this with your brothers, but also get into the habit of prayer alone and on the go, because that is how most parish priests pray. Keep in contact with your pastor, your parish, but also branch out and meet others in the archdioceses and visit the homes and parishes of other seminarians.

You need to get out and observe the life and culture of the archdiocese and what the people “are into.” Music, movies, fashions, parties, technology, sports, social clubs, etc. all have an effect on how our people will listen to God’s Word on Sunday. Know what is bringing hurt and pain to your people so you can be a healer, but also don’t stop being a fun guy. Being holy doesn’t mean running around “acting pious.”

God bless Louie. I can’t wait to head down to L.A. in the coming year and meet you. And bro, totally count on my prayers for you as you experience such a grace-filled life now. In Christ, Fr. Angel

Am I Being Called to Be a Priest? Part II

Let me repeat the question from Part I of this answer:

Hello Fr. Angel! I’ve been discerning for priesthood for about a year but, like everyone else discerning I guess, I’ve been looking for “strong” signs and haven’t had much of them which has been frustrating sometimes. How much do I have to rely for signs in weighing my decision for priesthood and how do I really know if I’m called or not? Thanks Father! 

Hello brother:

In Part I, I dealt with the beginning stages of discernment of the priesthood. Later on down the line, as a man begins to totally enter into the final stages where he will go into a seminary or formation program, these are some of the questions I would challenge him with.

I should say that a beginner, someone starting out in the seminary, is not going to be able to answer all these questions as the Church would like them to be answered. Some young seminarians go in pretty advanced and developed in their faith, and are more prepared to give their heart totally to Jesus and to what the Church is asking of them.

But other guys have doubts about Our Lord, or doubts about the Church, and they struggle sincerely with those doubts. That is fine, as long as they are really trying their best to conform their heart toward the goals the Church has set out. To be rigid, stubborn, and prideful, however, against the Church’s traditional goals of formation, is to set yourself up for heartache.

With that in mind, I also pose these questions for those who may be at a later stage of discernment for the priesthood:

Specifically, are you in love with the Lord? Do you love His People, the Holy Church? Those are the central signs to look for, that you love, that you want to sacrifice and give for Jesus and the Church, and that someday you believe you will be able to faithfully live the promises or vows of this way of life. These vows will be your way of embracing Jesus with loyalty until death, and even beyond into eternity. You live only to be eternally the friend of Christ and servant of His Church.

Other important questions are the following. Are you willing to learn to collaborate with authority figures, like seminary profs, spiritual directors, your pastor, your bishop? Do you have a generous heart so that you can give the energies of your body as well as your soul, forsaking a wife and children so that the people become your wife and children? Are you prepared to give up dating and go into seminary so that you can try out the celibate life? Along with living the celibate life, will you try to understand and accept the Catholic doctrines concerning human sexuality, the immorality of artificial contraception, and the intrinsic evil of abortion? Will you try to understand the mystery of marriage as a call from God to a man and woman who should be open to procreation and lifelong fidelity? Can you see children as the greatest blessing for marriage, and the life of the Church, and to cherish the youth as a special gift needing guidance and mentoring in the Church? Do you try to cultivate a special love for the Holy Virgin, who inaugurated the ministry of Jesus at the wedding of Cana and was His prayer partner all the way to Calvary?

Can you work with people of different backgrounds to witness to them your love of Jesus and your witness to the teachings of the Church? Are you prepared to learn the rich 2,000 year Tradition of the Church, handed down since the Apostles and passed on with purity to the saints? Can you work on accepting this Deposit of Faith, even when it causes you to have some doubts or difficulties? Will you strive to submit with obedience to what has been handed on, as the Apostle instructed us? Are you prepared to preach and teach this Catholic Faith, without dissenting and criticizing and causing confusion in the Church?

Do you understand that the heart of the Catholic priesthood is the sacrifice of the Body and Blood of Christ on the altar, and the absolving of sin in the confessional? Can you work on developing a life which is centered on confession and frequent Communion? Do you understand that devout Catholic faithful hunger and thirst for the sacraments to be celebrated with holiness, faith, and devotion? Are you prepared to be that type of priest who studies the rubrics of the Mass and the sacraments with a humble desire to celebrate these rituals according to proper Catholic guidelines?

If you can say yes to the above questions, then I think that is a positive sign that you should look at speaking to vocations directors and see when it might be possible to enter a seminary or formation house. If you are already in the seminary, I think you have found the home where you belong on your journey toward Holy Orders.

On the other hand….there are certain signs that, to me, would be an indication that you do not have a call to the priesthood. If a young man is already in the seminary, and answers yes to these questions, I would pray that he undergo a radical change or leave the seminary, please God, before he is ordained and is a scourge to the Church and another cause of sorrow for God’s people.

Do you feel that your education or knowledge makes you more sophisticated than the Pope and bishops? Do you feel your personal agenda, political leanings, or attitudes to social change will make you more of an agitator than an Apostle? Do you often use words like “I struggle” or “I have doubts” to camouflage, hide, or run away from the fact that you simply think, deep down, that the Church is wrong? Have you accepted the critiques of radical feminism, use these to judge the Church, and allow that “new sexual ethic” of dissident theologians and priests to guide you?

You should know that the priests I knew who molested young people or engaged in sexual intercourse with their staffs, parishioners, or even complete strangers, more often than not loved to quote from the new theology as rationale for their “creative thinking” about how they could break their promise of celibacy. It is true that you start to rebel in your personal life against the Church before you rebel in your mind and thoughts. First, a priest will have personal problems “below the belt” and then that will make him invent a new theology that departs from the “old fashioned” thinking of the Catholic Church.

Continuing on the signs that you should not be ordained a priest: Have you accepted gay marriage as something which should be legalized, or give reasons to rationalize contraception and abortion in “hardship cases?”  Do you find yourself whining about the Church, criticizing it to others, judging it as in dire need of the reform you feel entitled to give it? Are you one of those who like to speak of changing “structures” in the Church without showing much evidence that the structure of your personal life has been radically changed toward holiness? Is your public witness about Catholic Tradition and doctrine one of occasional bitching, whining, and obfuscation? In other words, when you are asked why you are a Catholic, do you start to tell long-winded stories about your struggles but you hardly seem to mention anything black and white that would really identify you as Catholic?

This is my outlook, after 30 years of observing seminarians, and seeing which end up staying and which end up leaving. These are the signs I see in those men I believe have a vocation to the priesthood, and those who do not. 

I recommend a thorough reading and study of the Vatican II document on the Life of Priests, called Presbyterorum Ordinis:

http://www.vatican.va/archive/hist_councils/ii_vatican_council/documents/vat-ii_decree_19651207_presbyterorum-ordinis_en.html

God bless and take care! Fr. Angel

I am a freshman college student who has same-sex attractions. I have felt that I am called to the priesthood since before my junior year of High School. Thinking about it has brought me nothing but joy, and it is what I want to do! I visited the local seminary, and talked with the director, who told me that under normal circumstances, men with SSA were not generally permitted to enter the seminary. Thoughts? Advice?

Anonymous

Hello anon:

Let me start by saying that a man or woman with a same-sex attraction can have a calling to the priesthood or religious life. However, the Church is very careful to explain certain specific cases in which that would not be the case. The Vatican released a document in 2005 that made the following statement:

the Church, while profoundly respecting the persons in question[9], cannot admit to the seminary or to holy orders those who practise homosexuality, present deep-seated homosexual tendencies or support the so-called “gay culture”

Those who are sexually active, those who have deep-seated problems resulting from their SSA, and those who support the “gay culture” in the sense that they accept the morality and acting out which is celebrated in the literature, pride parades, and clubs where hooking up takes place. However, it does not say that those men with SSA who have the outlook and belief of the Church and can live with a chaste outlook of human sexuality are barred from the priesthood.

Therefore, I believe it is accurate to say that men with SSA are called to the priesthood. There are men and women both who struggle with same-sex attraction who have served in the priesthood and religious life. They have carried out life-giving and creative ministries and in some cases have accomplished great missions on behalf of the Church.

However, for both heterosexual and homosexual candidates for the priesthood and religious life, the key here is “life giving” and “creative” commitment to Our Lord, Our Lady, and the Church. What acts as an impediment to life giving work is when you have become addicted, enslaved, and obsessed with attractions of any kind that do not leave your heart free to love with a full life.

What keeps you from being creative, and spiritually pro-creative, is when egotistical and narcissistic patterns of behavior and outlook do not allow you to form communities and “father” and “mother” them as priests and nuns should.

Priests and nuns who already as young students become entrapped in sexually addictive and highly sexualized relationships are just one step away from looking at life in the Church from the point of view of how it will satisfy their needs, instead of serve the spiritual benefit of their flocks.

From this flow numerous problems in dealing in a healthy way with authority, with people of the opposite sex, and with the numerous restrictions which healthy boundaries impose on a typical ministerial life. Then there are constant “escapes” into a secret or compartmentalized life which is where they do what “really” makes them happy.

To be fair, the numerous problems I am describing afflict candidates of all walks of life, but especially those who deal with sexual addiction and disorder from a young age. It was a common mistake in earlier times to say “those problems will work themselves out.” But they didn’t work out. Sometimes in the seminary guys just repressed their problems and deep-seated tendencies which were disordered. After ordination, their lives would fall apart in crisis and scandal.

In your case, you have to discern with the help of a spiritual guide and psychological testing whether you carry the problems which would later make you a miserable and unhappy priest. If you do not, then you should definitely not remove the priesthood as an option, either in a diocesan seminary or a religious community. 

In another post, I spoke of the future priest as the man who will father a community, and spiritually pro-create its growth with a chaste, joyful, and outgoing ministry. SSA presents unique challenges that can come about when you deal with other men, in formation and in the parish. 

Yet if, after years in formation, you are faithful to celibacy, you still fill that immense joy in your heart as you contemplate taking the sacraments to God’s flock and tending their hurts and needs with manly and dedicated patience, then it provides for the bishop an almost sure indication that you are called to Holy Orders. God bless and take care! Fr. Angel

PS I have edited this for clarity.

Hey father! Love your blog. I was just curious as to what I should do for the next step in vocation process. Im constantly hearing God's call, and I am quite sure that the priesthood is the correct vocation for me. But Im curious as to if one can attend an out of state seminary, or even out of country, or is it best to attend in your own state?

Anonymous

Hello anon:

It all depends on the vocation director, if you are dealing with the diocese, or if you’re dealing with a religious order, what their formation program is. A seminarian is usually not allowed to choose to leave the country without special permission of his bishop or religious superior.

Again, it depends on where you believe God is calling you to serve. In my case, I had a desire to serve in my home diocese, Fresno, CA. I spoke to my pastor, who called the vocation director, who met with me, who told me, “the Bishop is sending you to Camarillo, the seminary of the Archdiocese of Los Angeles.”

There was no discussion or decision on my part. Now, when I saw the seminary, I thought it was gorgeous and looked like a country club, so naturally I didn’t have any desire to fight that decision. It’s pretty cool to go to school 20 minutes away from the Pacific Ocean.

But I have a friend who was kicked out of the seminary, and he knew a priest, who knew another priest in Rome, who got him into the seminary for the diocese of Rome. So, he studied there and got ordained by the Pope. Or if you join an order like the Institute of Jesus Christ Sovereign Priest, they will send you to their seminary in Italy, because that is their only seminary.

A lot of religious orders send guys to foreign countries. A lot of American bishops like to send their seminarians to Rome, to the North American College. If you live in Los Angeles and don’t mind going through college here, but want to study theology in Rome, you should apply to another bishop in the U.S. who is known to send his students to Rome for theology.

In the old days, bishops were hesitant to accept guys from outside their area. But now, they are desperate and a good candidate is a precious commodity. Most bishops have no qualms at all stealing a vocation from another area and some vocations directors are pretty brazen about letting you know they’ll treat you better than x,y,z diocese. If a guy is young, pretty well adjusted, of average intelligence, and has a healthy faith life as a Catholic, you can almost name your diocese. 

In California, for instance, San Francisco could really use more priests. And that is a nice diocese, and a gorgeous area, in which to serve. If you live in Missouri, but you’re like, “I so want to go to California” you could call their vocations director and if you’re a pretty decent candidate, there is a very good chance they would get you in. And you don’t have to give any grave reasons. Heck, you could just say, “I hate the humidity in the Midwest, and I know that San Francisco has such an exciting and diverse culture, that’s what I’m attracted to.”

On the other hand, if your transcript has D’s and F’s, you’ve spent time in jail, you’ve been whoring around in debauchery for the last couple years, you’ve got body piercings everywhere, and your psychological tests conclude with “scary” being written everywhere, don’t expect most vocations directors to be too thrilled to take you in from outside your area. 

But a lot comes down to what you want to do in the Church, and whether you are judged as a decent candidate. Oh, and this is important. If you apply to a more liberal bishop, and you say, “I want to celebrate only the traditional Latin Mass” that won’t work out very well. Or, if you are applying to a really conservative Catholic bishop and you say, “I tend to be pro-choice and very strongly believe in gay marriage and women’s ordination” that won’t get you very far—at all. 

That said, I am very thrilled that you are considering the best vocation in the world. God bless and take care! You are in my prayers, Fr. Angel

When Parents Don’t Approve Your Vocation

A young man has messaged me to pray for his parents, who are not supportive of his calling to be a priest. Wow, that guy is seriously bringing back some memories for me.

When I was a senior in hs, and I told my parents about my call to the seminary, my mom was happy but my dad freaked out, as in mad. He said I was escaping reality too, that going to seminary was no way of trying to avoid college, and that I had only dated two girlfriends in hs and needed to experience more dating before taking vows.

As the months went on, he became angrier until one day he just said, “if you leave this house for the seminary, you are going without my blessing. I’m not going to call the Vocations Director or make problems for you. But you need to know young man, in no uncertain terms, I do not approve!”

I had already filled out the applications, taken the psychological testing, visited the seminary and had the interviews, and finally, had been interviewed by my own bishop who gave his blessing. On May 13th, the feast of the Virgin of Fatima, I had received the acceptance letter. HOW COOL IS THAT? I took it as Our Lady even giving her blessing. My sister even opened her big mouth and blabbed around school that I was going to be a priest so in the last weeks of senior year, in public high school, my friends were calling me “Father Angel” (weird, very weird).

Maybe my dad thought at some point I would back out. Maybe he held out hope that I would get the jitters and call the whole thing off. But when I didn’t he decided he had to lay down the law. That was one of the hardest moments in my life. I was not prepared emotionally and mentally to stand up to my dad and I thought for sure I would back down if it ever came to a confrontation. But I stunned myself and said, “That’s too bad, I’ll just have mom take me down to the seminary if that’s how you feel.” And then he said, “no, I told your mom not to take you either, because she needs to stand by me in discouraging what you are about to do.”

Yep, I kid you not. I had to call my big sister and her husband, and they had to come help me pack and then drive me to the seminary.

On the arrival day (I still remember 9/5/82) they had a gathering in the seminary conference hall, and the rector greeted all the parents. There I was, sitting all by myself, no mom and dad. It was the happiest day in my life, and it was the shittiest day in my life, at the same time. We were allowed one weekend off a month, and as the first weekend approached, I called and asked my dad if I could come home for the weekend.

To introduce a little lightheartedness into this serious story, the seminary dormitories each had ONE pay phone. And in those days, we didn’t all have “phone cards” so you would hear the ching ching of quarters as guys, one by one, stood in line for the phone to call home and be picked up. I had a ride home, I just needed to speak to my parents and let them know I wanted to come visit.

Since a month had gone by, my dad had calmed down. He was actually quite shocked that I hadn’t gone running back home, sniveling and apologizing for going against him. But the fact was, I was extremely happy in the seminary and didn’t have even the slightest tinge of remorse. I was even happier to hear him tell me that even though he still didn’t approve of me leaving for the seminary and was angry that I defied him, I was still to consider myself always welcome back at home.

As time went on, the seminary began to feel strangely more like home than “home” and what was even stranger, God’s grace eventually won my father over to accepting my vocation and giving me his blessing. But it was an uphill battle.